clock watcher

I'm a clock watcher.  Even sometimes when I am having fun, I need to know what time it is, how long it has been, how much longer it will last, etc.  It's can be an annoying trait. 

Living in an event-oriented culture (as opposed to the time-oriented culture I come from), this has become somewhat of a barrier for me.  On Thursday (Feb 28) we went to share a meal with our host family in their village.  I knew from our overnight experience there the week before that I needed to not wear my watch.  When I was uncomfortable, whether from an awkward silence or from a cultural difference, I would look at my watch.  You can imagine how I spent quite a bit of time, even though I was very much enjoying the experience, this compulsion was holding me back and I saw that my host mama noticed my actions and that it constrained her. 

Therefore, on Thursday afternoon I took my watch off, told myself that I did NOT need to know what time it was all the time and tried to free myself up to experience the culture fully.  I was surprised at how difficult it was for me to physically take the watch off my arm and restrict myself that way, but it made such a huge difference! 

I did not really miss knowing what time it was.  Instead, I felt that I was able to interact better and feel more a part of the conversation and evening than when I had been so absorbed by such an inconsequential item. 

Does that mean I shouldn't wear a watch at all?  No, but I might take it off for events like this until I feel that I am able to interact without needing the crutch.  I don't want to be a clock watcher and miss out on the experiences that I am living through or the relationships I could be building. 

I don't want to recognize the problem, but not do anything about it, the result of being able to better relate is worth any discomfort I might feel in trying to adjust my time-oriented nature.